Tuesday, January 14, 2014

The Gift of Life: Hudson Taylor Carpenter's Birth Story

Just moments after Hudson was born - 5:11am on 1.4.14


We made it to the hospital with not much time to spare!  I'm incredibly thankful, in retrospect, Tim and I decided to go when we did.  This birth experience was so very different than our last, I was unprepared for how relaxed and beautiful the laboring was at home.  I look back on Stella's birth with incredible memories; however, it was MUCH longer and more challenging than Hudson's...and, it's only natural I would expect things to be at least somewhat similar, feeling-wise, to last time.  Afterall, how could two labors be so entirely different from one another?

Around 6:30pm on 1/3/14, we were at home and the contractions started.  They were mild, manageable, and I was able to talk, eat, and walk through all of them without any issue.  One thing which was familiar about my contractions was how irregular they were - with both my children's births I had none of the standard "when your contractions are five minutes apart you will know to go to the hospital."  Mine followed no particular rhyme or reason: five, seven, ten, four, fifteen, nine, five...hmmm...so, how am I supposed to know when it's time? 

Stella was in bed for all of this, but even if she had been awake I am certain she would not have known anything was even happening.  It all felt so, well, normal.  Around 11pm Tim and I headed upstairs to go to sleep; he fell into a deep sleep almost instantly, something which makes me laugh every time because, since we married, the man has complained about having difficulty sleeping and yet he is almost always the first to start snoozing.  I lay awake for about an hour and a half, thinking, praying, contracting, and continuing to feel like this couldn't really be labor; I felt so peaceful.  Around 12:30am (now 1/4/14), I woke Tim up to say things were continuing and I wanted him to be with me during the experience, just in case it started to progress to real labor.  We held hands, talked, and laughed together - I would breathe through my contractions and then we'd continue whatever conversation we were having before the wave came upon me.

I recall feeling somewhat silly when I called my midwife at 2:30am, after having hours of these milder contractions.  What would I say was my reason for calling when I wasn't even sure if this was the real deal?  What could she say to me to help me make a decision?  Two things happened during that phone call:  I had my first contraction that took my breath away - I wasn't able to speak through it.  The second marker, which I shared with my midwife, was how at my routine, weekly, prenatal appointment earlier that day I was already three centimeters dilated and 50% effaced.  While Elizabeth, my midwife, had previously told me in our conversation I could either continue to labor at home or come into the hospital, when I shared this information with her and had my first powerful contraction she suggested we make our way in to the hospital in Dover.  [What is fortuitous is the fact I even got checked at my appointment earlier that day at all.  My prenatal practice, Dover Women's Health, is wonderful - I would call them patient led.  They offered a check but don't force it on women who are not overdue.  I decided to get checked because I had been having a few days of periodic, mild contractions since Christmas Eve, but I also knew to hold whatever information I received lightly because a woman can be 3cm dilated for several weeks without any true labor occurring.  That's why I love my practice, they empower you by offering you the information you need to make your own decisions regarding your birth experience.]

We waited for our dearest Grammy Suze, who came so quickly in the middle of the earliest morning hours, to be the one to greet our precious daughter when Stella awoke and we were at the hospital.  Susan had been sleeping with her phone at her bedside table for several WEEKS before Hudson's birth.  One time, Susan forgot her phone while out to lunch with her daughter, Katie, and I received a text from Katie which said something like, "My mom is FREAKING out bc she forgot her phone at home - so, if 'anything happens' please text me."  I will always remember Susan for her devotion to our family, and, thank God she arrived when she did because we started our journey to the hospital just in time on snow covered roads in the middle of the artic blast which had settled on New Hampshire earlier that day.  It was 3am.  The blizzard had stopped in the early afternoon of 1/3/14; and, while the roads were plowed, they couldn't salt or treat them because the temperatures dropped so rapidly it wouldn't have made any difference.  It was bitterly cold outside.

As we drove to Wentworth Douglass Hospital from Newmarket I continually coached Tim on his driving (guess even labor won't change this, honey...); urging him to drive slowly, lest we get in an accident and have to deliver our baby on the side of the road.  As we approached the light by the Burger King in Dover I felt something change.  I recall saying aloud to Tim, "He's moving into position...please keep driving slowly."  I could literally feel things progressing and I knew it was not going to be another long-labor as with Stella.

We arrived at the hospital at 3:45am and walked to Labor and Delivery.  I had FOUR contractions on the brief walk from the Emergency Room to L&D, so the nurses were prepped upon my arrival - things were really progressing.  Even at this point, though, I was able to have a lovely conversation with the Emergency Room Employee who walked with us from the ED to L&D; his name was Marcus, and he had two kids of his own.  As we got settled into the labor room we met our nurse, Alehson - a true angel and fellow Christian, who prayed us through the entire experience.  Alehson filled the tub, listened to my desires for our birth (we didn't even have time to get out the birth plan), and executed everything with grace and love. 

It was the fastest hour and a half of my entire life.  I remember feeling like the water in the birthing tub was incredibly hot because my body was working so hard.  Tim and Alehson kept a bucket of ice water and facecloths at hand to continually soak and place on my back and my face.  Both of them were wonderful, supportive, and calming.  Toward the very last minutes of my labor, nature kicked in and I stopped being able to control anything that was happening.  I just went primal - and my body truly did all the work of bringing our son into this world while I cried out for relief.

Hudson Taylor Carpenter arrived at 5:11am.  Elizabeth said something like, "Jenny, reach down and pick up your baby."  Our son sort of floated into my arms and I scooped him into the air, above the water.  So small, so sweet.  I clearly recall a disconnect between what had just happened and the fact this was my SON.  My child!  How could this be?  We barely had what I would consider a labor experience!?  How could this child be my own?

One and a half weeks later we are all wholeheartedly in love.  Our lives have shifted to become a family of four.  Stella is the most gentle and loving big sister I could possibly imagine.  Hudson is like his labor: peaceful.  The high of a natural childbirth is unparalleled.  I am just trying to soak in every moment of this precious time in my life because I know how quickly it all goes.